River von Waldron

River von Waldron

they/he

River is a neurodivergent interdisciplinary artist of the acting, writing, composing, and visual arts variety. They've been writing songs since they were 8 years old, and now, they write plays, poems, music, fiction, essays, and anything else they could possibly write. River loves forest green, bones, planning, collecting too many books they sometimes forget to read, and the type...
they/he

River is a neurodivergent interdisciplinary artist of the acting, writing, composing, and visual arts variety. They've been writing songs since they were 8 years old, and now, they write plays, poems, music, fiction, essays, and anything else they could possibly write. River loves forest green, bones, planning, collecting too many books they sometimes forget to read, and the type of laughter that sorta sounds like screams. They reside on Lenape Land (Philadelphia), with their bunny, Fauna. Their goal is to one day write by a window overlooking a body of water.

Recent Writing Credits:
GHOST TOWN: THE MUSICAL (book, lyrics, composer)
- Concept Album, Philadelphia Fringe 2021
- Polyphone Festival of New and Emerging Musicals, 2022

Upcoming:

THREE SCORPIONS WALK INTO A BAR
- CapitalQ First Annual New Play Festival; June 2022

coop: the lesbian chicken play
- WYOpen Stages - University of Wyoming Mainstage Production

Plays

  • coop: the lesbian chicken play by River von Waldron
    Recommendations: 3
    ·
    Cast: 
    5–9
    ·
    Genre: dark comedy, drama + 1 more
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    Keyword: Aging lesbians, frank discussion of Lesbian sexual activity + 4 more
    Genre: dark comedy, drama, satire
    Keyword: Aging lesbians, frank discussion of Lesbian sexual activity, addiction, coping with trauma, economic hardship, Severed Thumbs
    What happens when you need to get to the hospital for a severed thumb but you don't have a car 'cause it's too expensive and you can't get an ambulance 'cause it's too expensive but you ALSO can't get a driver 'cause it's too expensive? You hitchhike, of course. And what do you get when you hitchhike without a thumb? Well, you get "coop." "coop...
    What happens when you need to get to the hospital for a severed thumb but you don't have a car 'cause it's too expensive and you can't get an ambulance 'cause it's too expensive but you ALSO can't get a driver 'cause it's too expensive? You hitchhike, of course. And what do you get when you hitchhike without a thumb? Well, you get "coop." "coop", colloquially known as "the lesbian chicken play," takes a look into the messy lives of lesbian farmers, Clove and B. Facing addiction, financial insecurity, and queer elders that don't know they're queer elders, these lesbians attempt to find more life amongst their survival.
  • THREE SCORPIONS WALK INTO A BAR by River von Waldron
    Recommendations: 1
    ·
    Cast: 
    3–4
    ·
    Genre: comedy, satire
    ·
    Keyword: Lesbianism, nonbinary lesbians + 7 more
    Genre: comedy, satire
    Keyword: Lesbianism, nonbinary lesbians, butch lesbians, gay bar, frank discussion of Lesbian sexual activity, Alcohol, scorpions, challenging the patriarchy, confronting the patriarchy
    Bone, a butch lesbian, waits in a bar for their also butch lover to arrive so they can discuss their relationship troubles. When a straight man interrupts Bone's waiting to hit on them, Bone serves his ass back to him on a silver platter. THREE SCORPIONS WALK INTO A BAR rips apart the patriarchy and spits in its face, demanding an answer as to why straight people feel so entitled to infiltrate and take...
    Bone, a butch lesbian, waits in a bar for their also butch lover to arrive so they can discuss their relationship troubles. When a straight man interrupts Bone's waiting to hit on them, Bone serves his ass back to him on a silver platter. THREE SCORPIONS WALK INTO A BAR rips apart the patriarchy and spits in its face, demanding an answer as to why straight people feel so entitled to infiltrate and take gay spaces away from its inhabitants. Through these rough exteriors, hardened facades, and explorations of lesbianism, we discover we are all just scorpions: glowing in the dark not because of anything innate, but emitting light because of the rays beamed onto us from others.