DON'T DO THIS TO US!

by Stephanie Swirsky

In 2017, Rachel is worried that Jared Kushner is making the world more dangerous for Jews because his public image embodies the worst of Jewish stereotypes: he's wealthy, avaricious, and ominously wields world power behind the scenes. She devises a plan to go back in time to 1999, hook up with teenager-Jared, and break his penis, preventing him from marrying Ivanka – saving the reputation of Jews around the...

In 2017, Rachel is worried that Jared Kushner is making the world more dangerous for Jews because his public image embodies the worst of Jewish stereotypes: he's wealthy, avaricious, and ominously wields world power behind the scenes. She devises a plan to go back in time to 1999, hook up with teenager-Jared, and break his penis, preventing him from marrying Ivanka – saving the reputation of Jews around the world.

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DON'T DO THIS TO US!

Recommended by

  • Alexa Derman: DON'T DO THIS TO US! by Stephanie Swirsky
    “

    This play is at once tight and sprawling, super focused and wild/raucous. It captures a certain kind of delicious Jewish American humor SO well -- the sad-happy, deranged-joyful of it. Really complicated and yet also a total romp.

    This play is at once tight and sprawling, super focused and wild/raucous. It captures a certain kind of delicious Jewish American humor SO well -- the sad-happy, deranged-joyful of it. Really complicated and yet also a total romp.

    ”
  • Shaun Leisher: DON'T DO THIS TO US! by Stephanie Swirsky
    “

    This play is hilarious and poignant and just overall insane in the best possible way!! Love how this play portrays how hard it is to be a teenage girl while also throwing in the struggles of Jewish identity. So many muddy conversations going on here that need to be happening.

    This play is hilarious and poignant and just overall insane in the best possible way!! Love how this play portrays how hard it is to be a teenage girl while also throwing in the struggles of Jewish identity. So many muddy conversations going on here that need to be happening.

    ”
  • Emma Goldman-Sherman: DON'T DO THIS TO US! by Stephanie Swirsky
    “

    What a hilarious piece of writing! Swirsky does a marvelous job with this very funny concept that I seriously wish could work in reality! If only! I love the characters! I love the language! I love the tension created as I wait for the breaking of Jared Kushner's penis!

    What a hilarious piece of writing! Swirsky does a marvelous job with this very funny concept that I seriously wish could work in reality! If only! I love the characters! I love the language! I love the tension created as I wait for the breaking of Jared Kushner's penis!

    ”

Character Information

  • Rachel
    36
    Can be played by:
    • Actor Race/Ethnic Identity
      White
    • Actor Gender Identity
      Female
  • Jared Kushner
    17
    Can be played by:
    • Actor Race/Ethnic Identity
      White
    • Actor Gender Identity
      Male
  • Ravit
    36 and 17
    Can be played by:
    • Actor Race/Ethnic Identity
      White
    • Actor Gender Identity
      Female
  • Jodi
    17
    Can be played by:
    • Actor Race/Ethnic Identity
      Middle Eastern, North African, or Arab American
    • Actor Gender Identity
      Female
  • Shira
    17
    Can be played by:
    • Actor Race/Ethnic Identity
      White
    • Actor Gender Identity
      Female
  • Elisheva
    17
    Can be played by:
    • Actor Race/Ethnic Identity
      White
    • Actor Gender Identity
      Female