Mabel & Alice - Cash

Cash is a riotous black comedy about two elderly sisters who owe a large sum of money to local thug Mick the Ripper and are being hounded by Dirty Dave the debt collector — and only have three days to come up with it. With their cupboards bare and their wits no sharper, Mabel (the pompous dreamer) and Alice (the brutish cynic) launch a series of hare-brained schemes that spiral from the absurd to the downright...

Cash is a riotous black comedy about two elderly sisters who owe a large sum of money to local thug Mick the Ripper and are being hounded by Dirty Dave the debt collector — and only have three days to come up with it. With their cupboards bare and their wits no sharper, Mabel (the pompous dreamer) and Alice (the brutish cynic) launch a series of hare-brained schemes that spiral from the absurd to the downright criminal.

Joined by a parade of eccentric neighbours — including a miming drama queen, a lamb-loving gambler, and a pair of lust-struck pensioners — the duo stumble through cat-kidnapping, egg-painting, Tinder scams, and more. Inspired by the anarchic spirit of Rik Mayall and Adrian Edmondson, ‘Mabel & Alice – Cash’ is a slapstick farce of insults, violence, and wild imagination — proving that growing old doesn’t mean growing up.

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Mabel & Alice - Cash

Recommended by

  • Dan West: Mabel & Alice - Cash

    When elderly sisters Mabel and Alice get in deep with the local loan shark, they must rally their pensioner friends to help them come up with the necessary 10,000 quid by Monday. Their reckless schemes and outrageous machinations are downright hysterical. And the third-wall breaking mob enforcer, Dirty Dave, takes this dark farce completely over the top for me. Truly, this may well be the funniest play that I’ve read on this platform all year.

    When elderly sisters Mabel and Alice get in deep with the local loan shark, they must rally their pensioner friends to help them come up with the necessary 10,000 quid by Monday. Their reckless schemes and outrageous machinations are downright hysterical. And the third-wall breaking mob enforcer, Dirty Dave, takes this dark farce completely over the top for me. Truly, this may well be the funniest play that I’ve read on this platform all year.

Character Information

  • Mabel
    Due to the physical nature of the role, the character could either be played by a younger actress aged up, or by a male actor crossdressing as an older woman. Must be comfortable wearing underwear on stage.
    Character Age
    70's Presenting
    Character Gender Identity
    Female
  • Alice
    Due to the physical nature of the role, the character could either be played by a younger actress aged up, or by a male actor crossdressing as an older woman.
    Character Age
    70's Presenting
    Character Gender Identity
    Female
  • Richard
    Character Age
    70's Presenting
    Character Gender Identity
    Male
  • Dirty Dave
    Must be comfortable breaking the fourth wall and working with the audience. Must also be able to ad-lib and stay in character. Must be comfortable wearing underwear on stage.
    Character Gender Identity
    Male
  • Lillian
    Preferably good at miming
    Character Age
    50's - 70's Presenting
    Character Gender Identity
    Female
  • Dorothy
    Character Age
    50's - 70's Presenting
    Character Gender Identity
    Female
  • Arthur
    Character Age
    50's - 70's Presenting
    Character Gender Identity
    Male
  • Lou
    Character Age
    50's - 70's Presenting
    Character Gender Identity
    Male
  • Constable Bob
    Character Gender Identity
    Male
  • Announcer
    Recorded voice that calls a horse race

Development History

  • Type Reading, Organization East Coast Theatre, Year 2026