All Angela wants is a happy Christmas--or a more exciting life--but her daughter's left for college, her husband's obsessed with fantasy football, the plumbing's a mess, and her cat won't stop peeing where he shouldn't. Mom May thinks she should get a hobby--or a handyman--but a run-in with old friend Kelly leaves Angela aspiring to the thrills her pal gets from social media. Before long, Angela's giving Candy Crush lives to high school sweetheart Billy Sweeney, despite Kelly's warnings that Billy's a guy who uses shouty caps and the wrong form of your. Ignoring the danger signs, Angela invites Billy to fix her pipes, and the former prom dates find themselves bonding over flip phones as they color Christmas pictures by the fire. Their nostalgic bliss is interrupted by an ominous phone call from Kelly, but not before Angela's cat and her husband catch them in the act and force everybody, including May, to adopt a healthier relationship with technology.

This play was workshopped at the 2015 Hormel Festival of New Works at Phoenix Theatre and the third place winner of the Pickering Prize for Playwriting Excellence.