Brian Cern

Brian Cern is a Twin Cities-based actor and playwright, whose work has won numerous awards and contests throughout North America, Australia and the UK. A member of the Dramatists Guild, he received his training at Cardinal Stritch University, where his theatre and writing studies led him to a deep appreciation for the stories that unite us in the human condition. As parables, his work has been called “imaginative,” “beautifully soulful,” and “thought-provoking.” He lives in suburban St. Paul, Minnesota, with his wife and son.

Brian Cern is a Twin Cities-based actor and playwright, whose work has won numerous awards and contests throughout North America, Australia and the UK. A member of the Dramatists Guild, he received his training at Cardinal Stritch University, where his theatre and writing studies led him to a deep appreciation for the stories that unite us in the human condition. As parables, his work has been called “imaginative,” “beautifully soulful,” and “thought-provoking.” He lives in suburban St. Paul, Minnesota, with his wife and son.

Scripts

The Death of Rachel Smith

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

After an unfortunate encounter with violence, Rachel's existence is turned upside down as she struggles to hold on to her quiet, peaceful life.

After an unfortunate encounter with violence, Rachel's existence is turned upside down as she struggles to hold on to her quiet, peaceful life.

Sound and Fury (school version)

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

Bodie is on stage, trying something new.
Clive and Derek are there to support their friend, no matter what.

Bodie is on stage, trying something new.
Clive and Derek are there to support their friend, no matter what.

Sound and Fury (adult version)

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

Bodie is on stage, trying something new.
Clive and Derek are there to support their friend, no matter what.

Bodie is on stage, trying something new.
Clive and Derek are there to support their friend, no matter what.

A Quiet Life

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

A young couple, seeking to start a new life, takes refuge from a storm in an abandoned barn, where everything they held true is changed.

A young couple, seeking to start a new life, takes refuge from a storm in an abandoned barn, where everything they held true is changed.

Top Shelf of My Fridge, 2 AM

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

After being neglected for too long, the contents of my refrigerator discuss their fate.

After being neglected for too long, the contents of my refrigerator discuss their fate.

Farewell To Mamma T

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

While looking for her brother, Missy visits her grandmother, hoping that she has some news.

While looking for her brother, Missy visits her grandmother, hoping that she has some news.

Shadows Have Offended

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

Fresh off his first big success, a playwright is concerned that he will never have an opportunity like this again.

Fresh off his first big success, a playwright is concerned that he will never have an opportunity like this again.

Maribeth Has a Pretty Dress

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

While waiting for the funeral director to arrive, a couple discusses the new reality of their lives following the passing of a family member.

While waiting for the funeral director to arrive, a couple discusses the new reality of their lives following the passing of a family member.

Consequences

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

While sitting in his therapist's office, Elliot comes to grips with his parents having done the best they could.

While sitting in his therapist's office, Elliot comes to grips with his parents having done the best they could.

Sustain

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

Can a forbidden affair be sustained? Should it be?

Can a forbidden affair be sustained? Should it be?

Some Things (a monologue)

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

A person calls a friend, looking for some help after a major life change.

A person calls a friend, looking for some help after a major life change.

The Box

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

The thought experiment, the scientists said, was this... If you put two people in a box with a radioactive isotope, you would have to consider the people to be both alive and dead simultaneously, as your typical cat did not know if the isotope had decayed without observing it.

The thought experiment, the scientists said, was this... If you put two people in a box with a radioactive isotope, you would have to consider the people to be both alive and dead simultaneously, as your typical cat did not know if the isotope had decayed without observing it.

Old Sports

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

After a lifetime, two gentlemen reaffirm their commitment to each other, through the bitter end.

After a lifetime, two gentlemen reaffirm their commitment to each other, through the bitter end.

A Fairy’s Tale

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

After a long exile, the Queen of the Fairies has returned.
Will she end the war, or will her bloodlust return?

Triggers: War, death, kidnapping, and fairy cannibalism.

After a long exile, the Queen of the Fairies has returned.
Will she end the war, or will her bloodlust return?

Triggers: War, death, kidnapping, and fairy cannibalism.

The Lemon Tree (a monologue)

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

A monologue in which a young woman proves that nothing is sacred as she spills her family secrets.

A monologue in which a young woman proves that nothing is sacred as she spills her family secrets.

Ship Captain Crew

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

Sure, bar dice is a fun way to pass an evening while having a few cold ones with friends.
But, did you ever think about it from the dice's point of view?

Sure, bar dice is a fun way to pass an evening while having a few cold ones with friends.
But, did you ever think about it from the dice's point of view?

Ophelia

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

A friend is attempting the herculean task of convincing his friend that she is not alone.

A friend is attempting the herculean task of convincing his friend that she is not alone.

Squatchin'!

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

There are things in the woods. Big, hairy things with very large feet.
These are the people least qualified to find them.

There are things in the woods. Big, hairy things with very large feet.
These are the people least qualified to find them.

A Queen is Exiled (a prologue to "A Fariy's Tale")

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

In a quiet suburban living room, a grandmother tells her granddaughter a tale of fairies, goblins, war, and an insatiable hunger for blood.

This serves as the prologue for the one-act play, "A Fary's Tale."

In a quiet suburban living room, a grandmother tells her granddaughter a tale of fairies, goblins, war, and an insatiable hunger for blood.

This serves as the prologue for the one-act play, "A Fary's Tale."

A Walk Through the Snow

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

A brief conversation in which a woman, just a few weeks post-surgery, expresses her fears about her recovery and future health.

A brief conversation in which a woman, just a few weeks post-surgery, expresses her fears about her recovery and future health.

Cyrano de Fond du Lac

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

In a cold Wisconsin February, Colton works up the courage to ask out his long-time crush, Roxi. With the help of Irv the bartender, Colton figures out the best way to do it, in the most non-cheesy way possible. Who knows, will this encounter end with a visit to Colton's ice shanty on Lake Winnebago?

In a cold Wisconsin February, Colton works up the courage to ask out his long-time crush, Roxi. With the help of Irv the bartender, Colton figures out the best way to do it, in the most non-cheesy way possible. Who knows, will this encounter end with a visit to Colton's ice shanty on Lake Winnebago?

Ten Thousand Lakes

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

During the biggest snowstorm to hit Minnesota in a generation, Bill gets a life-altering visit from his granddaughter. She will need to gather all her strengths, while Bill needs to hold it together to accept the truth of the world.

It’s a play about families making hard decisions for the greater good.

During the biggest snowstorm to hit Minnesota in a generation, Bill gets a life-altering visit from his granddaughter. She will need to gather all her strengths, while Bill needs to hold it together to accept the truth of the world.

It’s a play about families making hard decisions for the greater good.

Malört and the Siblings Wojciechowski

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

When dealing with a choice between two undesirable options, three siblings and their friend discuss their family’s unorthodox method for choosing the right candidate.

When dealing with a choice between two undesirable options, three siblings and their friend discuss their family’s unorthodox method for choosing the right candidate.

Fresh Hell

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

A true story about a marriage being put through the wringer as they try to register their child for summer camp.

A true story about a marriage being put through the wringer as they try to register their child for summer camp.

A Bad Play

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

A young playwright receives a lesson the about the cruel business of theatre when they visit their friend, the Artistic Director of the local community theatre. The play explores the delicate balance between art and commerce in an honest, albeit comedic, manner.

A young playwright receives a lesson the about the cruel business of theatre when they visit their friend, the Artistic Director of the local community theatre. The play explores the delicate balance between art and commerce in an honest, albeit comedic, manner.

The NRA Field Guide To The American Family (or a Vision for a More Perfecter Future)

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

A satire about gun control in America today, a family is overjoyed to discover that their child has made the ultimate patriotic sacrifice.

A satire about gun control in America today, a family is overjoyed to discover that their child has made the ultimate patriotic sacrifice.

Her Love, Endures

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

A multi-decade spanning drama, "Her Love, Endures" follows two friends, from their meeting in high school, throughout the rest of their lives. Wedding, births, and deaths... all the moments that form a life. It is a celebration of friendship.

A multi-decade spanning drama, "Her Love, Endures" follows two friends, from their meeting in high school, throughout the rest of their lives. Wedding, births, and deaths... all the moments that form a life. It is a celebration of friendship.

Gregor and Yahweh Drinking Coffee

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

Sometimes, the new gods need to be reminded about what happened to the old gods.

Sometimes, the new gods need to be reminded about what happened to the old gods.

Beautifully So

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

In order to keep the romance alive, Christopher is searching for a one night stand.
But, will his wife approve?

In order to keep the romance alive, Christopher is searching for a one night stand.
But, will his wife approve?

Scholarship

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

Sometimes, being awarded a scholarship is not the start of the adventure you were hoping for.

Sometimes, being awarded a scholarship is not the start of the adventure you were hoping for.

A Savanna Story

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

A child soldier and an old man encounter each other out on the plains of Africa. One is waiting to die, the other is fighting for a reason to live. Together, they find common ground over what it means to love and be alive.

A child soldier and an old man encounter each other out on the plains of Africa. One is waiting to die, the other is fighting for a reason to live. Together, they find common ground over what it means to love and be alive.

James Walters and the Case of the Miramar Murders

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

It's the type of story that would begin "The fog rolled in thick off the bay," if only I could tell stories, and if you weren't in front of your computer, searching for a new script to read. It's a tale of detectives, of murders, of actors jockeying for fame. A tale inspired by the old radio stories, the ones that stick in your head like a bad pop song.

It's the type of story that would begin "The fog rolled in thick off the bay," if only I could tell stories, and if you weren't in front of your computer, searching for a new script to read. It's a tale of detectives, of murders, of actors jockeying for fame. A tale inspired by the old radio stories, the ones that stick in your head like a bad pop song.

The Fake

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

Two roommates, freshly out of college, debate their place in a social media-driven world. One wants nothing to do with it, the other wants to make it work for him

Two roommates, freshly out of college, debate their place in a social media-driven world. One wants nothing to do with it, the other wants to make it work for him

Magna Mora

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

When the universe can’t seem to make up its mind, it turns to Chris to give it a push and show it the way forward. But at what price?

When the universe can’t seem to make up its mind, it turns to Chris to give it a push and show it the way forward. But at what price?

Strings

by Brian Cern

Synopsis

After a lifetime of pain, an impossible woman from out of a legend demands to have her voice heard, over that of her more famous family.

After a lifetime of pain, an impossible woman from out of a legend demands to have her voice heard, over that of her more famous family.