Hillary DePiano

Hillary DePiano is a playwright, fiction and non-fiction author best known for fantastically funny fairy tales, surprisingly sweet slapstick and unrelentingly upbeat writing advice. With over two dozen plays for everyone from pre-schoolers and up, she’s honored to have had her work performed in schools and theatres around the world.

As the author of the How to Start Writing series, she regularly shares advice and pep as a blogger and speaker. Since 2010, Hillary heads the Northeastern New Jersey region for NaNoWriMo.org and works as a volunteer in support of their creative mission. She also writes about eBay, e-commerce, and selling online under the name T. W. Seller at TheWhineSeller.com.

For more information about her books, plays, and blogs or to connect via social media, visit...

Hillary DePiano is a playwright, fiction and non-fiction author best known for fantastically funny fairy tales, surprisingly sweet slapstick and unrelentingly upbeat writing advice. With over two dozen plays for everyone from pre-schoolers and up, she’s honored to have had her work performed in schools and theatres around the world.

As the author of the How to Start Writing series, she regularly shares advice and pep as a blogger and speaker. Since 2010, Hillary heads the Northeastern New Jersey region for NaNoWriMo.org and works as a volunteer in support of their creative mission. She also writes about eBay, e-commerce, and selling online under the name T. W. Seller at TheWhineSeller.com.

For more information about her books, plays, and blogs or to connect via social media, visit HillaryDePiano.com.

Scripts

The Servant of 123 Masters

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

Truffleato came to Venice hungry for a life of leisure and cookies. Instead he found a master that's supposed to be dead, a bakery deal about to crumble and a man seeking his lost fiance. The professional servant's plans for sweet retirement get increasingly complicated as he finds himself taking on one... two... three masters (ah ah ah!). If he can pull it off, it's triple wages and all the cookies he can eat...

Truffleato came to Venice hungry for a life of leisure and cookies. Instead he found a master that's supposed to be dead, a bakery deal about to crumble and a man seeking his lost fiance. The professional servant's plans for sweet retirement get increasingly complicated as he finds himself taking on one... two... three masters (ah ah ah!). If he can pull it off, it's triple wages and all the cookies he can eat, but can he keep his masters apart when it turns out they're all looking for each other?

aka a hilarious parody of Sesame Street by way of Carlo Goldoni's The Servant of Two Masters

The Montholouges

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

When the school slashes their budget, the misfits of the anti-bullying club have to scramble together a fundraiser or lose the only place they have to be themselves. The last thing anyone wants to do is pose for a charity calendar, especially when they've already got a target on their backs just for being different. But as they each take their turn in the spotlight, the resulting snapshots say more about who...

When the school slashes their budget, the misfits of the anti-bullying club have to scramble together a fundraiser or lose the only place they have to be themselves. The last thing anyone wants to do is pose for a charity calendar, especially when they've already got a target on their backs just for being different. But as they each take their turn in the spotlight, the resulting snapshots say more about who they all are right now than they do the months of the year.

A funny, touching monologue play about all the ways who we are intersects with when we are.

The Raven / Lenore

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

A man is mourning his lost love when he is visited by the ghostly specter of a raven. But the raven is not what it seems and some ghosts don't want to be forgotten. A short drama inspired by Edgar Allen Poe's poem The Raven that offers a new twist on exactly what, or who, The Raven truly is.

1 m, 1 w, 1 n
2-4 actors possible
Run time < 10 minutes

A man is mourning his lost love when he is visited by the ghostly specter of a raven. But the raven is not what it seems and some ghosts don't want to be forgotten. A short drama inspired by Edgar Allen Poe's poem The Raven that offers a new twist on exactly what, or who, The Raven truly is.

1 m, 1 w, 1 n
2-4 actors possible
Run time < 10 minutes

The She-Bear

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

When a pack of wolves nearly tear the prince apart, the very She-Bear he’d been hunting saves his life. As man and beast heal from their wounds, the prince starts to question his sanity as his mind twists around an impossible idea: Is he losing his mind or has he really fallen in love with a bear? Magic and mayhem, romance and the ridiculous dance hand in paw in this modern adaptation of the Italian fairy tale...

When a pack of wolves nearly tear the prince apart, the very She-Bear he’d been hunting saves his life. As man and beast heal from their wounds, the prince starts to question his sanity as his mind twists around an impossible idea: Is he losing his mind or has he really fallen in love with a bear? Magic and mayhem, romance and the ridiculous dance hand in paw in this modern adaptation of the Italian fairy tale the Italian fairy tale from Giambattista Basile’s The Tale of Tales (Il Pentamerone, Lo cunto de li cunti) where love is the best kind of madness.

Comedy / Fantasy
One Act
35-45 minutes
1 Male 2 Female 1 Any
Cast size: 4-10+ (ensemble of wolves & the prince’s hunting party can be as large or small as needed)

Arm Candy

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

A funny, feminist fairy tale play!

Betta’s father won’t stop nagging her to get married but those suitors don’t care that she’s a brilliant inventor, they’re only looking for some arm candy! When she builds herself a handsome man out of sugar and brings him to life, it seems like the perfect solution. But when a queen covets her groom and steals him from their wedding, Betta must save both her handcrafted...

A funny, feminist fairy tale play!

Betta’s father won’t stop nagging her to get married but those suitors don’t care that she’s a brilliant inventor, they’re only looking for some arm candy! When she builds herself a handsome man out of sugar and brings him to life, it seems like the perfect solution. But when a queen covets her groom and steals him from their wedding, Betta must save both her handcrafted husband and reputation before time runs out. The result is part 17th Century gender-flipped steampunk Frankenstein, part madcap ensemble romantic comedy and all around fun! Alchemy and elbow grease replace wishes and magic in this modern retelling of the Italian fairy tale Pintosmalto from Giambattista Basile’s The Tale of Tales (Il Pentamerone, Lo cunto de li cunti).

Comedy / Fantasy
35-45 Minutes
2 male, 3 female, 1 any (4-7+ performers possible)

The Fourth Orange and Other Fairy Tales You've Never Even Heard Of

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

It’s bedtime bedlam when a washed up clown tries to sell three unruly princesses on something other than their fairy tale favorites. Cinderella, Rapunzel, Sleeping Beauty... these are just a few beloved classics that Truffaldino will NOT be reading tonight because you’ve heard them a zillion times already and, frankly, he’s sick of them. Instead, he’ll be dusting off four of the weirdest, wildest and most...

It’s bedtime bedlam when a washed up clown tries to sell three unruly princesses on something other than their fairy tale favorites. Cinderella, Rapunzel, Sleeping Beauty... these are just a few beloved classics that Truffaldino will NOT be reading tonight because you’ve heard them a zillion times already and, frankly, he’s sick of them. Instead, he’ll be dusting off four of the weirdest, wildest and most downright hilarious fairy tales you’ve never even heard of. But will his new spin on these old tales be enough to get his sneaky nieces asleep in time? This funny and flexible adaptation of Giambattista Basile’s classic, The Tale of Tales, is told in the slapstick tradition of classic Italian theatre with a modern twist.

100-120 minutes (60 minute option also available)
25w 12m 11any (11 to 60+ performers possible)

The Myrtle

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

A fast and funny fairy tale play!

When a talented gardener wishes for a child, instead she gives birth to a sprig of a myrtle that she loves like a daughter. But when thieves make off with the marvelous tree and gift it to the prince, he discovers the secret of the fairy that shares the plant’s destiny. Now the prince must keep his promise to help reunite myrtle and mother at the risk of losing the woman he...

A fast and funny fairy tale play!

When a talented gardener wishes for a child, instead she gives birth to a sprig of a myrtle that she loves like a daughter. But when thieves make off with the marvelous tree and gift it to the prince, he discovers the secret of the fairy that shares the plant’s destiny. Now the prince must keep his promise to help reunite myrtle and mother at the risk of losing the woman he loves. Love blooms in this modern adaptation of the Italian fairy tale from Giambattista Basile’s The Tale of Tales (Il Pentamerone, Lo cunto de li cunti) where fantasy, romance and commedia-style slapstick provide fertile grounds for an unforgettable production.

The Fourth Orange

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

A fast and funny fairy tale play!

There were only supposed to be three oranges.

All Franceschina had to do was deliver one measly basket of sausages to the witch and go on her way. But, no, she had to play the hero and ended up cursed and forgotten, caught in the crossfire of someone else’s fairy tale. Well, she’s learned her lesson. From now on, she’s minding her own business and leaving the action to the...

A fast and funny fairy tale play!

There were only supposed to be three oranges.

All Franceschina had to do was deliver one measly basket of sausages to the witch and go on her way. But, no, she had to play the hero and ended up cursed and forgotten, caught in the crossfire of someone else’s fairy tale. Well, she’s learned her lesson. From now on, she’s minding her own business and leaving the action to the real heroes. But when a dragon is destroying an entire kingdom and nobody will do anything about it, she’'ll have to decide the role she wants to play in her own story and what really makes a hero. A mash-up of the Italian fairy tale, The Merchant, from Giambattista Basile’s The Tale of Tales (Il Pentamerone, Lo cunto de li cunti) with characters from Carlo Gozzi’s The Love of Three Oranges, The Fourth Orange is a wacky commedia-style fairy tale adaptation for all ages.

Comedy / Fantasy
20-30 minutes
4 m, 6 f, 5 any (7-20+ actors possible)
Flexible staging, lots of small speaking parts and things for the ensemble to do, tons of fun for all ages to watch and perform!

Goosed!

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

A fast and funny fairy tale comedy in one-act!

When two poor sisters use what little money they have to save a strange goose from the butcher, the animal is so grateful it produces them piles of gold coins. But when their greedy neighbors want the treasure for themselves, they discover this goose isn’t so easily cooked. From a blood thirsty fowl with golden stool to a careless prince who gets it in the end...

A fast and funny fairy tale comedy in one-act!

When two poor sisters use what little money they have to save a strange goose from the butcher, the animal is so grateful it produces them piles of gold coins. But when their greedy neighbors want the treasure for themselves, they discover this goose isn’t so easily cooked. From a blood thirsty fowl with golden stool to a careless prince who gets it in the end, soon everyone in this wacky commedia-style fairy tale is feeling the pinch. With a large cast, majority female roles, lots of physical comedy and room for improvisation, Goosed is a fairy tale in the style of classic Italian slapstick comedy that’s a literal butt-load of fun for all ages to watch and perform. Kindness is as good as gold in this modern adaptation of the Italian fairy tale The Goose from Giambattista Basile’s The Tale of Tales (Il Pentamerone, Lo cunto de li cunti)

Comedy / Fantasy
One Act
25-35 minutes
6 Female 1 Male 5 Any
Cast size: 11-unlimited

Features
Flexible/simple staging
Large cast with majority female roles and an ensemble that can increase or decrease based on your casting needs.
Opportunities for physical comedy, improvisation and puppets.
School friendly version with tamer content available.
Great length for drama competitions and classroom study.

Nana’s Happy Happy, Good News Only Birthday Video Chat (LIVESTREAMING PLAY)

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

The whole family was supposed to be together tonight to celebrate Nana’s birthday until a storm left them all stranded and scattered. The grandkids decide to take the party virtual with a birthday video chat, but they don’t want any nasty surprises to ruin the special day. Can this group of disasters make it look like they’ve got their act together even though they’re miles apart?

With a set of siblings...

The whole family was supposed to be together tonight to celebrate Nana’s birthday until a storm left them all stranded and scattered. The grandkids decide to take the party virtual with a birthday video chat, but they don’t want any nasty surprises to ruin the special day. Can this group of disasters make it look like they’ve got their act together even though they’re miles apart?

With a set of siblings trying to hide exactly where they’re calling from and why, a ex-couple pretending to be in the same room, a babysitter whose lost control of her charges, a cousin with a questionable online business, a series of calls from increasingly ridiculous smart devices and a grandma with secrets of her own, it’s not going to be easy for everyone to keep their drama hidden so this evening can stay Good News Only.

Weak Daze (livestreaming version)

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

Has TJ’s comfortable routine become a rut? When an old friend comes to town with a challenge, TJ’s got to figure out what it really means to live a little without changing your life to meet someone else’s expectations. Week Daze zooms out and looks at our daily routines from a new perspective as all five weekdays play out simultaneously across the stage in a comic ballet.

6-7 Gender Neutral roles
30-40 minutes...

Has TJ’s comfortable routine become a rut? When an old friend comes to town with a challenge, TJ’s got to figure out what it really means to live a little without changing your life to meet someone else’s expectations. Week Daze zooms out and looks at our daily routines from a new perspective as all five weekdays play out simultaneously across the stage in a comic ballet.

6-7 Gender Neutral roles
30-40 minutes (One Act)

Original stage play version was the winner of the one-act category of The Chameleon Theatre Circle’s 16th Annual New Play Contest.

(originally titled Weak Days)

This is a livestreaming play meant to be performed via Zoom, Google Meet, etc. There is also a stage version of this play listed separately.

Week Daze (stage play version)

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

Winner of the one-act category of The Chameleon Theatre Circle’s 16th Annual New Play Contest.

Has TJ’s comfortable routine become a rut? When an old friend comes to town with a challenge, TJ’s got to figure out what it really means to live a little without changing your life to meet someone else’s expectations. Week Daze zooms out and looks at our daily routines from a new perspective as all five weekdays play...

Winner of the one-act category of The Chameleon Theatre Circle’s 16th Annual New Play Contest.

Has TJ’s comfortable routine become a rut? When an old friend comes to town with a challenge, TJ’s got to figure out what it really means to live a little without changing your life to meet someone else’s expectations. Week Daze zooms out and looks at our daily routines from a new perspective as all five weekdays play out simultaneously across the stage in a comic ballet.

6-7 Gender Neutral roles
30-40 minutes (One Act)

(originally titled Weak Days)

The Three Little Pigs and the Big Bad Storm

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

Who’s afraid of the Big Bad Storm? Not the little pig with the emergency plan! Now if only the other two would at least do something to save their bacon before the Big Bad Storm comes to whoosh and swoosh and knock stuff down. This new twist on the fairy tale classic introduces storm safety and prep in a safe and funny way to remind audiences of all ages that they don’t need to be scared of storms to take them...

Who’s afraid of the Big Bad Storm? Not the little pig with the emergency plan! Now if only the other two would at least do something to save their bacon before the Big Bad Storm comes to whoosh and swoosh and knock stuff down. This new twist on the fairy tale classic introduces storm safety and prep in a safe and funny way to remind audiences of all ages that they don’t need to be scared of storms to take them seriously.

Comedy For Young Performers
16 parts of any gender (with room to add more if needed), can be done with as few as 8 performers
10 minutes

New Year's Thieve

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

It’s New Year’s Eve at the North Pole but the work of the holidays isn't over. Father Time’s warehouse is under renovation and Santa’s Workshop is bursting at the stocking seams trying to house the world’s New Year shipment. The extra pressure isn't helping head elf Murry tolerate the festivities on what’s already his least favorite holiday. They've almost made it to midnight when an unexpected, and strangely...

It’s New Year’s Eve at the North Pole but the work of the holidays isn't over. Father Time’s warehouse is under renovation and Santa’s Workshop is bursting at the stocking seams trying to house the world’s New Year shipment. The extra pressure isn't helping head elf Murry tolerate the festivities on what’s already his least favorite holiday. They've almost made it to midnight when an unexpected, and strangely familiar, caller in an old silk hat appears looking for the boss. He’s convinced he’s cursed and searching for a cure that may even be beyond Santa Claus’ powers. When the situation turns desperate and the visitor turns thief, will Time be on their side? Can the elves restore the light of the future before the ball drops on another year?

Run Time: 30 - 35 minutes
2 Male, 3 Female, 3 Either
7 to 10+ actors possible

Vardiello

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

How much damage can one half-wit do before his mother gives him the boot? A modern adaptation the 17th century Italian fairy tale by Giambattista Basile.

Comedy
1 m, 1 f, 2 e
10 minutes

How much damage can one half-wit do before his mother gives him the boot? A modern adaptation the 17th century Italian fairy tale by Giambattista Basile.

Comedy
1 m, 1 f, 2 e
10 minutes

Daddy Issues

by Hillary DePiano

Synopsis

Amelia’s looking for love in all the wrong faces. Though she's packed her baggage and dragged it to date after date, the memory of her father still haunts her. But when she meets a strangely familiar face in the subway, she’ll finally have to confront the ghost of her past.

A drama in one act.

*Approximate Run Time: 15 to 20 minutes
*Roles for 1 female, 1 male, 3 either gender
*Simple staging
*Dramatic...

Amelia’s looking for love in all the wrong faces. Though she's packed her baggage and dragged it to date after date, the memory of her father still haunts her. But when she meets a strangely familiar face in the subway, she’ll finally have to confront the ghost of her past.

A drama in one act.

*Approximate Run Time: 15 to 20 minutes
*Roles for 1 female, 1 male, 3 either gender
*Simple staging
*Dramatic monologue for a woman in her 20s or 30s