Emma Horwitz

It’s the 10th century! A plague rages on in Germany! Everyone is turning into foam!

When two hermits find an orphan named Mary, they scheme a saintly rescue mission to protect her purity at any and all costs. Mary, however, has other plans for herself.

Francis and Alice walk their dogs off leash in Riverside Park. A play about dying and talking and dying to talk and talking.

Do you ever forget what the word masturbation means? Sorry, I mean: do you ever remember what the word defenestration means? Did I say defenestration, I meant meatballs, did you pick them up from Val Salvio’s? The famous restaurant, yes, the one on Eighth with all of the sisters-in-law who you used to love back when Peter your assistant-husband was out getting cake.

I answered an ad someone had emailed the school-wide listerv. I had a job catering weddings for an upscale diner in town but the season was coming to an end as winter was rolling in, and I needed cash in hand, untaxed. They said they had one daughter, and that she was very easy. That’s all they said about their one daughter, that she was easy.

In the pine-woods of the Poconos at a sleep-away camp, where Every Girl Here Is A Winner, welcome to the last summer of your life.

Lip-syncs, line-up, Lil Miss, and that poster you were never brave enough to put up in your bedroom because your sister-twin's still scared of you. A queerbildungsroman of athletic proportions, where the ghosts of your past don’t so much haunt as demand, sucking hickies on your neck like your life depends on getting, finally, a little pleasure.

A shabbos ascent into the multi-million-dollar industry of lice-picking.

Three women ferociously feed on their hairiest dreams while swimming in tubs of Pantene.