F.J. Hartland

F.J. Hartland

F. J. Hartland holds an MFA in Playwriting from Carnegie-Mellon University where he was a Shubert Fellow and the winner of the Bud Yorkin Playwriting Award, He made his New York City playwriting debut at the age of 23 when the Ensemble Studio Theatre workshopped his play A Piano Player With Sad Brown Eyes. Twice, he was the winner of the Samuel French OOB Short Play Festival. Other NYC venues where his work...
F. J. Hartland holds an MFA in Playwriting from Carnegie-Mellon University where he was a Shubert Fellow and the winner of the Bud Yorkin Playwriting Award, He made his New York City playwriting debut at the age of 23 when the Ensemble Studio Theatre workshopped his play A Piano Player With Sad Brown Eyes. Twice, he was the winner of the Samuel French OOB Short Play Festival. Other NYC venues where his work has been seen include: Emerging Artists Theatre, GayFestNYC, the 13th Street Theatre, Lovecreek Productions, Quaigh Theatre, and Lincoln Center Library Theatre. In 2019, F.J.’s short play Tina was named Best Play in the Equity Library Theatre’s Summer Short Play Festival. His ten-minute play What the Puck? Was a finalist for the Heideman Award at the Actors Theatre of Louisville.
Samuel French (now Concord), United Stages, Original Works, Next Stage Press, and The Louisville Review have published his plays.
He is the recipient of a Playwriting Fellowship from the Pennsylvania Council on the Arts. His full-length play Games of the Mind won Throughline Theatre’s New Play Competition in Pittsburgh. Another play Waiting for Fair was chosen for the inaugural season of Pittsburgh Playhouse/Point Park University’s Virtual New Play Festival. F.J. has made a record-setting eighteen appearances in the Pittsburgh New Works Festival, winning Best Play four times. Other Pittsburgh venues where his work has been produced include: Duquesne University, Bricolage, South Park Theatre, Future Ten, Pittsburgh Playwrights Theatre, First Night Pittsburgh, Cup-A-Jo, Pyramid Productions to name a few.
In addition to being a playwright, F.J. is an experienced stage director (with more than 100 productions to his credit) and a professional actor (Actors Equity Association member since 1991).

Plays

  • A BLANKET OF STARS
    Two elderly women drag lawn chairs to the middle of a field late at night to watch a meteor shower.
  • A SMALL ACTOR
    Despite what the old theatre adage says, there are small roles--and they're played by small actors.
  • ACROSS A CROWDED ROOM
    To cross the room to meet a stranger or not to cross the room--that is the question.
  • baby...maybe...
    When Jonah and his partner Giancarlo decide to adopt a baby, naturally, their friends host a baby shower. But between the games and the cake, something happens that will change all of their lives forever. Sometimes, it DOES take a village.
  • BARS
    A young woman falls in love with a man serving time in prison--for murdering her brother.
  • BE A GUEST
    In this modern day homage to YOU CAN'T TAKE IT WITH YOU, Abigail, a college student, can't wait to meet her boyfriend's family. Be careful what you wish for! The sister carries around the taxidermied body of the family pet (and makes it talk). The mother is obsessed with planning her funeral. The father does historical re-enactments (of First Ladies). The maid speaks no English. Then there...
    In this modern day homage to YOU CAN'T TAKE IT WITH YOU, Abigail, a college student, can't wait to meet her boyfriend's family. Be careful what you wish for! The sister carries around the taxidermied body of the family pet (and makes it talk). The mother is obsessed with planning her funeral. The father does historical re-enactments (of First Ladies). The maid speaks no English. Then there's the mysterious uncle who keeps escaping from the attic!
  • BOOTSIE
    W.C. Fields warned performers--never work with dogs or children. This monologue shows why.
  • BUNIONS AND REGRET
    It's Lacey's last day working as a server before she heads off to college. Her friend Doris, an older server, has a send-off waiting for her.
  • CAKE WITHOUT FROSTING
    Beth is busy cleaning up from her birthday party when an uninvited guest arrives--with a gift that will change her life forever...
  • CAPE COD EVENING
    Inspired by a painting by Edward Hopper, CAPE COD EVENING explored what is to become of a recently divorced couple--and their dog.
  • CEMETERY PLOT
    After the death of his mother, a young man is convinced he was not a good son. Then one day while visiting his mother's grave, a mysterious stranger might just change his mind.
  • CLEAN SHEETS
    Noah, a writer, returns home from vacation--and finds someone from his past waiting for him. Should he follow a familiar path--or take a new one?
  • CLOTHES MAKE THE MAN
    Being a man is tough. Sometimes you have to do whatever it takes to cope!
  • FAT AND FICTION
    Ludlow and his mother have very different recollections of his lifelong "battle of the bulge."
  • FOR THE RECORD...
    While leaving the theatre one night, an actor is confronted from someone from his past.
  • FUNERAL IN THE RAIN
    Two actors play all the mourners at the funeral of an ordinary woman who touched the lives of all of those around her.
  • GAMES OF THE MIND
    Ten years ago, the scholastic quiz team at Our Mother of Perpetual Sorrows won the championship. Now at a class reunion, truths surface about what really happened! Secrets are revealed and relationships challenged for the students involved. The play is told in scenes from the present and flashbacks to the past.
  • GUMPTION
    Two gay men (one younger, one older) are strangers. But they become friends when their paths cross under unusual circumstances.
  • HELL NO, DOLLY!
    When Anna Mae goes to the Antiques Roadshow, she ends up with more than an appraisal on her item. She gets an appraisal on her life!
  • HRDZA
    It's 1983 in the rustbelt of Western Pennsylvania. The mill has closed and Marek, the hard-working son of immigrants, has lost the only job he has ever held. His unemployment affects his relationship with his wife, his children, his mother, and even his friendships at the New Deal Bar. As his life spins out of control, can Marek find a way to save his dignity and his family?
  • IF YOU SAY SO
    When Cara tells her retired husband Nils that he needs to find a hobby, she never dreamed he'd choose THIS!
  • LIKE MOM USED TO SAY
    Doug is holding a terrible secret. Can Ross get him to "come clean" in this matter of life and death?
  • LOSING LOUISE
    Neal comes home to find his wife gone and his house completely emptied. It's a good thing he has his kindly neighbor Jane to lean on--or is it?
  • MOOSE
    Lovers may leave--but food is always there!
  • MOTHER TONGUE
    Matt, a young gay artist living in NYC, finds himself torn between the two most important people in his life. There's his mother Bertie, a struggling stand-up comic, who can't stop hating someone who is dead (Matt's dad). Then there's Matt's mysterious new (and much older) lover Cale, who can't stop loving someone who is dead. As Matt navigates these two very different...
    Matt, a young gay artist living in NYC, finds himself torn between the two most important people in his life. There's his mother Bertie, a struggling stand-up comic, who can't stop hating someone who is dead (Matt's dad). Then there's Matt's mysterious new (and much older) lover Cale, who can't stop loving someone who is dead. As Matt navigates these two very different relationships, Bertie's stand-up routines serve to reflect and comment on the action.
  • MOTHERS AND OTHER STRANGERS
    A young man makes his daily stop to check on his sickly, elderly mother--but it is anything but a routine visit!
  • NANA'S HOME MOVIES
    When a Landon inherits his grandmother’s old movie projector and the accompanying home movies, he plans on selling them…until…
  • ONIONS
    Aaron has important news to share with his mother--but will he ever be able to make her understand?
  • POSTCARDS FROM A DEAD DOG
    A man and his mother find an unusual way to communicate.
  • RIMSHOTS
    The Court Jester and the King's Chancellor find themselves in the dungeon--all because of one bad joke!
  • ROADKILL
    Two paths of two strangers cross in the woods late at night. Could one of them be a serial killer?
  • SANTA SECRET
    A lonely man makes a last ditch attempt to find love.
  • SCATTERED
    Three friends go into the woods to scatter the ashes of a friend who was special to each of them. Through a series of flashbacks, we find out why he was important to each of them. They learned that letting go is a painful--but sometimes necessary--choice.
  • SECOND STORY SUNLIGHT
    A middle-aged woman on vacation comes to the conclusion that her past is out of her control. Inspired by a painting by Edward Hopper.
  • SHAVING LESSONS AND HALF-WINDSOR KNOTS
    While dressing one morning, a man contemplates all the life lessons his father taught him.
  • SHUFFLE, BALL CHANGE...AND DIE!
    It's "Dateline" meets "Dance Moms" in this black comedy/mystery. Which parent is willing to go to any lengths to secure one child the "Star Turn" dance in the Spring Recital at the Dance-tastic Dance Studio in rural Iowa? The play combines video with live stage action as the fictional TV documentary program "My Eye on Crime" attempts to explore the scandal!
  • SMOKE AND FIRE
    Hillary has been bullied all his life and no adult seems to know or care. Finally, he can't take it anymore and takes matters into his own hands.
  • SUMMER SHOWER
    When their brother gets engaged, Maggie and Latitia are forced into planning a bridal shower for their future sister-in-law. All they know about her is that her favorite color is plaid. A meddling mother, a favorite aunt and family secrets are all part of the action. And then the bride-to-be arrives (with surprises of her own)!
  • SWATCHES
    Should the kitchen be yellow? Blue? Green? Deciding what color to paint the kitchen has serious (and comic) ramifications for couple Wynn and Anson.
  • TECHNICALLY SPEAKING
    On a pier (or is it a dock), two men watch ships (or are they boats) pass by as their relationship comes to an end.
  • TED
    Some one-night stands never seem to end. Right, Tad? Thad? Tab?
  • THAT IS THE QUESTION
    Every question has an answer, right? Or does it only lead to another question?
  • THE PERHAPS
    When his mother abandons him, a lonely little boy is sent to live with his grandmother, who watches old movies all day and night. Then he discovers an imaginary friend--film legend Bette Davis.
  • THE PICKLE JOKE
    Late at night, a lonely man finds some comfort from his voice-activated device.
  • TINA
    Junior high school might have been a long time ago, but the memories still linger--especially if you ever met someone like Tina.
  • TROLL
    On a warm summer evening in his garden, Gilbert, an older gay man, reflects on--not only the changes in his own life--but changes in the LGBT community, from the days when homosexuality was classified as a mental disorder to the legalization of same-sex marriage.
  • VERMILLION SUNSET
    When Della and Perry, two elementary school teachers, meet during recess duty, there is an immediate connection. But are a love of old movies, trivia, and reruns of "Perry Mason" enough to build a relationship?
  • WHAT THE PUCK?
    Sitting on a steel beam high above the city, two construction workers share lunch--and a very strange dream about hockey.
  • WHAT'S LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT?
    After a strenuous match on the court, Marge has an encounter with a very odd player in the clubhouse.
  • WORDS TO THAT EFFECT
    A boy's best friend is his mother--especially when that boy is a drag queen.