Kelsey Sullivan

Gleefully icky and equally sticky, “i am but a tiny little lady” is a terrifyingly catastrophic, yet truly joyous CELEBRATION of the nastiest parts of ourselves. Throughout four short shows, you’ll meet the Drooly Dames, a Clingy Queen, some Stinky Girls, and a Bloomy Babe who are all dealing with womanhood in their own… special way. Skin will be chewed and swallowed, Bacteria will be grown and destroyed, Blood and spit will be shared like water and wine - And these little ladies are your guide through it all! Join us and luxuriate in the unsettling bathwater that is this show.

5 women. They chew. They spit. They repeat. The cycle continues until it does not.

This exploration of body mutilation and female friendship starts the way any story of this nature would - with a sleepover! Two girls, Elina and Margie, are enjoying some silly, stinky fun time, telling each other about the grossest things that they do on a daily basis like hiding wrappers and peeling off dead skin. However, these quirky little habits quickly devolve, revealing the unsettling, dark, and twisted actions that the two take to combat the intense loneliness, numbness, and sadness they feel deep inside.

Sheriff Hardy Justice is spending another rainy night minding the drunk tank in dusty Cooterville Montana, when in walks a dame with a murder for him to solve. There's something about Cecelia Hooferberg; her long legs, her luscious red lips, her desperate need to avenge her father's death... or it might be that she's a horse.

The Cooterville Caper was written for the Story Relay at the 2023 Valdez Theatre Conference Fringe by The Loud Mouthed Malamutes (aka Kelsey Sullivan, Jillian Blevins, Jan Probst, Erin Moughon and Dante Medema).

Worm is quite happy being a just that: a worm. However, there is one thing missing - this worm wants teeth. And you, yes you, are going to help it get them! Follow along on Worm’s journey as it meets old friends, sings some songs, and discovers how far it's willing to go for some pearly whites. In the end, it is up to you - will you help Worm get the teeth it wants? Or will you take things a step further and help it get what it really needs?

In a society not so different from our own, paper money/currency as we know it has been erased and replaced with “love transactions.” The more love you give, the less wealth you’ll have, and the more love you take, the more wealth you’ll have. Enter Kevin, a 28 year old con man who has found the secret to getting rich quick! Will he stay a con forever, or will love get him in the end?

Clara and Rocky are best friends! They do everything together - they talk, and laugh, and sing, and dance, and tell each other everything. But when Clara starts taking up too much space in the relationship, Rocky must build up the courage tell them - and they need the help of you and your best friends to do so!

Kory is living in a grey world - no really! Everything is grey! Grey walls, grey skies, grey skin - need I go on? Their only comfort is the turquoise chain their mother gave them when they were a little tyke. But, when Kory’s stress reaches an all time high, the chain breaks and transports them to the brilliant, beautiful, and oh so blue Land of Turquoise! In this utopia, all of Kory’s wants, needs, and dreams are taken care of. But they soon find that this land may not actually be everything they ever wanted…

NOTE: NO MUSIC HAS BEEN COMPOSED

Meet our lovely hostess for the evening, one Miss Ghostess with the Mostess. See, she has been trying to pass on from this realm since she died, and she has narrowed down her unfinished business to one word: REVENGE. Now, she needs your help to choose who from her life actually deserves to incur her wrath. A silly yet poignant reflection on how anger and cynicism can warp a worldview, Ghost Party will stick you in a liminal space that will encourage you to be your goofiest self, while also asking you to reflect on your emotions and the ways in which you express, embrace, and cope with them.

Note: This play was written for an Irish audience and thus includes references to Irish places/businesses. It can be adapted to serve a US audience.

Jibberish Play follows the relationship between two lovers who only speak Gibberish. They understand everything that the other says (well, at least on the surface), while the audience is aware of the emotions that lie dormant beneath. Will they be able to dig deeper than the words being spoken to save their relationship? Or is this the end?

Based on ancient Irish folklore, Midnight Court weaves together two tales, that of Aengus, God of Love, and Aibell, Goddess of the Banshees. Aibell steals men away from their marital beds and castrates them for not pleasing their wives adequately. Aengus just loves love! So when Aengus makes two humans, Rowan and Eabha, fall in love and get married, and Rowan fails to fulfill Eabha’s needs, Aibell and her banshees steal him away. Now, Eabha and Aengus must journey through Ireland to convince Aibell to give him back. A wet, wild, and whacky exploration of love, lust, and partnership, Midnight Court uses humor, mysticism and eroticism to discuss real world issues such as the orgasm gap, toxic relationships, female friendships, and gatekeeping.

NOTE: This is just a libretto. The music is not yet composed.

The Knidia and Her Stain was inspired by a Lucian text that tells the story of a young man who was so infatuated with the statue of Aphrodite of Knidos that he snuck in to where she was displayed, jerked off onto her backside leaving a stain, and then was so embarrassed he jumped off of a cliff into the waters below. In the play, the man jerks off onto the statue, but immediately must face the consequences when the statue comes to life.

Long ago, the Vikings and Sirens lived in harmony, until one Viking tried to take a Siren's voice box for himself. His act of violence spurred a war between the two clans; now, the Sirens live deep below the waters, torturing Viking prisoners to heal their own trauma. But when Freya, the Siren Princess, falls in love with Viking prisoner Váhli, she must choose - uphold the traditions of her sisters, or risk her livelihood for the enemy. A story of rage, revenge, and retribution, Within These Wounded Walls explores sexual assault and bodily mutilation through a fantastical lens.