Steve Lyons

PRODUCED. Full Length.
Four strangers at The Horseshoe Cafe are united by the politics of the men's room, a peach dish, time management and a very special pair of panties. Four monologues slowly weave into a tight little plot with a big twist! No nudity or violence. Adult humor. A few bad words. Runs about 80 minutes plus an intermission.

NOTE: The first act of this play has occasionally been produced as a stand-alone one-act play.

REVIEW EXCERPTS:
"Cute and quirky" KPBS Radio
"Cleverly constructed, this hip little tale is great fun." San Diego Union
"a treat from beginning to end." San Diego Playbill
"A happy ending as scrumptious as peaches en regalia." LA Stage Scene
"Smart monologues." LA Weekly
"Lyons' text is clever and his jokes are swift." Back Stage West
"Short but exquisitely structured." The Scotsman
"the perfect start to your Edinburgh evening." London Guardian
"lovely comic touches ... witty and sweet natured." Fest Online
"the writing is sharp" Examiner.com Philadelphia
"Lyons has a gift for stream-of-consciousness monologue" SF Examiner
"Peaches en Regalia... goes down smoothly and pleasantly" The Idiolect
"very funny... with a post-modern twist." Examiner.com San Francisco
"the funniest play this season" BeyondChron.org
"inspired flights of zaniness" San Francisco Bay Guardian
"quirky little moments of revealing human behavior." Bay Area Reporter
"unhinged, quirk-laden and weirdly benevolent." SF Chronicle
"Four opening monologues become one beautifully intertwined story of lives merging at a critical juncture." Ventura County Reporter

PRODUCED. Full Length.
Dingo, a regular ol' guy from Oroville California, gets accepted to UC Santa Cruz, where he becomes a Women's Studies major so he can practice his hobby of chasing women around. To fund his womanizing, he gets a job at the Santa Cruz Mystery Spot, where nothing is as it seems. There he meets Sylvia Plath, who is on a quest from the afterlife. Sylvia gives him love advice in his awkward pursuit of the owner's daughter. When the Mystery Spot is sued for deceptive advertising by a disgruntled customer, Dingo enlists Sylvia's help to try to save the Mystery Spot. Unbeknownst to Dingo, Sylvia has her own agenda.

"Mystery Spot received lots of laughs, and the show's comedy resonated throughout." Sacramento Press
"Mystery Spot is an entertaining, unusual play." Davis Enterprise
"Nimble satire with academic/feminist trimmings" Sacramento News & Review
"an enjoyable night at the theater, with laughs aplenty, food for thought and a remarkable amount of intelligent, feminist-centered dialogue." Cascadia Weekly

PRODUCED. Full Length.
Oregon Senator Wayne Morse and his heroic battle to stop the Vietnam War before it began. In this surreal drama inspired by real events, Wayne Morse returns to earth. He and a dead Pentagon intelligence analyst revisit the events that led to the war, and try to prevent it this time. About 70 minute running time, no intermission.
Cast: 1 female, 5 male. Ages 30 - 65

PRODUCED. Full Length.
Subtitled “The almost true story of a play that nearly happened about a war that never occurred, as told by the mannequins who were there,” at the center of this comedy is the Pig War of 1859, which was a border dispute between the United States and Britain over ownership of the San Juan Islands. This war is significant because ultimately there was no war! Peace was chosen over war.

This is the wacky, true tale of Emilia Bave and her “San Juan Saga.” Mrs. Bave’s play was originally presented in 1959 on San Juan Island (off the coast of Washington) in celebration of the centennial of the Pig War. The premier of the play featured local acting talent. However, when she wanted to re-mount the play the following year, she found no one wanted to be in her play! Undaunted, she re-wrote the script to be a narration with the reluctant actors replaced by mannequins. She presented her play to unsuspecting visitors for nearly 20 years.

In this comedy, Mrs. Bave’s cantankerous Pig War mannequins spring to life, and take over the telling of the Pig War tale.

PRODUCED. Full Length.
A comedy about sex and funerals. Set during the heady days of the .com explosion, this madcap comedy follows the schemes and love life of a group of crazy young urbanites. When Simone brings home a new boyfriend she found at a poetry festival, and her roommate Jenny has her fiancee move in while his home is fumigated, the stage is set for fun, farce and a mad plan to market performance art funerals. Morris, the flaming mortician's beautician, arrives to lend his considerable skills to this wild idea to make big money.
Cast: 3 male, 2 female

"Engaging comedy that's sure to make you laugh." SFGate.com
"witty... a wonderful treat!" The Oroville Mirror

Contains adult humor, but no bad words or nudity. 90 minutes. One intermission.

UNPRODUCED Full Length.
Michael, twenty years old, returns home to his apartment to discover that a version of himself from twenty years in the future has moved in. The forty year old Michael confronts the twenty year old Michael about his alcoholism. In turn, the twenty year old challenges the forty year old to regain the spark that drove him to pursue his passion, photography. Boiling beneath the surface is an unspeakable tragedy that the older Michael is desperately trying to correct.

Comments from the panel at Last Frontier Conference:
"Boy you had me . . . I loved this play all the way through." Paula Vogel
"I was crying, which doesn't happen very often for me." Emily Mann
"I was intrigued from the beginning." David Esbjornson, director
"I'm glad your play had such a good response. " Terrence McNally

65 minutes. No intermission.

UNPRODUCED Full Length.
Grover’s Corners, one hundred years later. All characters from Our Town are long dead. All characters except one. Grover’s Corners has become a hub of the financial industry. We begin our story December 1996 - Grover’s Corners is bristling with money, fueled by the mortgage industry. Life is good. What could possibly go wrong? Based on the true story of Brooksley Born, chairperson of the Commodity Futures Trading Commission, and her struggle to regulate the banking industry.

UNPRODUCED. Full Length.
Inspired by the dramatic story of Biosphere 2, an environmental experiment in 1991/1992. Four people are sealed in an airtight dome in the desert. For two years they must survive debilitating hunger and dwindling oxygen. But mostly, they must survive each other.