Emily Hageman

Emily Hageman

Emily Hageman is a music and theater educator currently residing in Sioux City, Iowa. Her plays have seen production with Samuel French Off Off Broadway Short Play Festival, Heartland Theatre Company, A Light in Dark Places, the Red Eye 10s International Play Festival, Eden Prairie Players, Midwest Dramatists Conference, the Growing Stage Theatre, Theatre Evolve, Spokane Stage Left, Iowa State University,...
Emily Hageman is a music and theater educator currently residing in Sioux City, Iowa. Her plays have seen production with Samuel French Off Off Broadway Short Play Festival, Heartland Theatre Company, A Light in Dark Places, the Red Eye 10s International Play Festival, Eden Prairie Players, Midwest Dramatists Conference, the Growing Stage Theatre, Theatre Evolve, Spokane Stage Left, Iowa State University, Memoriam Development Nightshade, Chagrin Valley Little Theatre, and Gi60s. Emily is published with YouthPLAYS (“Everafter.com” and “The Man Card”) and Stage Partners (“Back Cover, "The Cages We Build," "Brian the Comet," and "The Pandemic That Didn't Define Them"). Her plays are constantly workshopped by the magnificent high school and middle school actors at Siouxland Christian School.

Plays

  • The Adaptors
    FULL LENGTH: Two years ago, a team of super powered individuals calling themselves The Adaptors was created. These individuals got their powers after their experienced deep trauma. And now the question is can we trust these emotionally damaged people with the welfare of the public? After all, how can we expect the hurting to heal?
  • Heart Land
    FULL-LENGTH: Marty, a smart young therapist from New York City, travels to Granger, Minnesota to work in a high school that has been ripped apart by the revelation that one of their best loved teachers has been behaving inappropriately. This is Marty's humbling journey of self-discovery, constantly shifting expectations, and the relentless pursuit of her heart--and the hearts of others.

    WORK IN PROGRESS. BE GENTLE.
  • Joan's Arc
    FULL LENGTH: Joan is a deeply moral and highly principled high school student. Mason is her best friend who died in front of her (actually, on her) in a school shooting. Joan thinks that the staff at her school may have falsified PSAT scores. Mason is along for the ride. This isn't your typical ghost story.

    NEW DRAFT UP.
  • Back Cover
    ONE ACT PLAY (NEW FORTY-FIVE MINUTE VERSION): The unexpected divorce of Madison’s parents relocated her to New York City--a place that she has vowed to loathe. Through incredible coincidence, Madison finds a shoebox full of letters belonging to a young woman named Jessica. A connection is formed that will forever change the course of Madison’s life. Narrated by Madison’s older self, Back Cover is a story of...
    ONE ACT PLAY (NEW FORTY-FIVE MINUTE VERSION): The unexpected divorce of Madison’s parents relocated her to New York City--a place that she has vowed to loathe. Through incredible coincidence, Madison finds a shoebox full of letters belonging to a young woman named Jessica. A connection is formed that will forever change the course of Madison’s life. Narrated by Madison’s older self, Back Cover is a story of loss, courage, humanity, and the painful--but wonderful--experience of growing up. Published by Stage Partners.
  • Batman Vs. The Person Stealing Out of the Work Fridge
    ONE ACT PLAY: Batman's villains have unionized, leaving him feeling antsy and moody and loud (always so, so loud). But a terrible, terrible conspiracy around Greek yogurt nabbing from the fridges of Wayne Enterprises might just be the thing to get this bat's blood pressure back up! Not that he's actually a literal bat. Probably.
  • The Blue Hour
    ONE ACT PLAY: Theo's grandpa has died, and he would give anything to see him one more time. A remarkable miracle sends him back in time to meet his grandpa while he serving in the Korean War. A play about grief, and what we can do with it.
  • Brian the Comet
    ONE ACT: Jude's mom is an astronaut, 254 miles away on the International Space Station, so when her father is diagnosed with lung cancer, Jude is the only one who can take care of him. In the hospital, she meets a boy named Brian who suffers from aneurysms and together, they learn about what they fear, what they know, what they believe, and what they hope for.
  • The Cages We Build
    ONE ACT PLAY: Dean's dad isn't around, his mom is deeply broken, and everyone at school either hates him or fears him. That's just who he is. But then, he meets Lucy and learns that life can be whatever you make it, and no matter what cage you build, you always have the key. Published with Stage Partners.
  • Character Arc
    ONE ACT PLAY: Once a month, estranged sisters Ashley, Brittany, and Taylor come to visit their ailing father in their hometown. As his condition worsens, the sisters must decide which will move back home to make his end more comfortable, but can one act of nobility change the trajectory of a life riddled with misery and mediocrity?
  • Fairy Tale Career Aptitude Test
    ONE ACT: Pinocchio, Cinderella, the three little pigs, and all their friends have taken their Fairy Tale Career Aptitude Test (FATCAT), but... they aren't exactly thrilled with the results.
  • Hamlet: Abridged (and Possibly Improved?)
    ONE ACT PLAY: A ridiculous and surprisingly faithful adaptation of Hamlet. Important lessons will be learned by everyone, especially the importance of not playing a game of curtain ghost.
  • The Inexplicable Chaos Factor of Mia Gregory
    ONE ACT: Liv is one of the most brilliant teenage mathematicians in the country, but she does not understand her best (and only) friend Mia. Like, at all. And now, she's doing this stupid play to try to figure it out.
  • One Seriously Ugly Duckling
    ONE ACT PLAY: Duckbecca is very smart, thoughtful, and nice. She also happens to be a little plain. She's got lots going for her, but the Narrator is determined to use her to tell the story of "The Ugly Duckling," an "inspiring" tale for young girls everywhere. Who gets to tell our stories and what can we do about it?
  • Risa Hopkins Needs a New Heart
    ONE ACT: Risa Hopkins is an extremely nice eighth grade who writes THE best poems. She also has severe heart failure and will need a new transplant. Her classmates are determined to help her. A story about where your heart lives.
  • Shot
    ONE ACT PLAY: David is a young photographer with a gift for seeing the best in people. His best friend Jesse is a little off, but David knows who he is--until he doesn't any more. A play about what we see in others, and what it means.
  • Seven Small Deaths
    ONE ACT PLAY: After Anna's seventh miscarriage, she and her husband Jake go to a fertility doctor. Anna doesn't want Jake there, but, well, he's there.
  • The Strangest of All Rooms
    ONE ACT: Hailey's father is broken, and she is ashamed of him. She must decide if she can love him for everything he is--even his strangest of all rooms.
  • Age Before Beauty
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Paulette is... difficult to say the least, but Rachel really needs her help for one last trip. Come on, Paulette, give Rachel a break, you're driving her crazy!
  • All the Difference
    TEN-MINUTE PLAY: Walt and Al are about as different as they could possibly be, separated by generations and wildly different interests (Minecraft and Robert Frost don't exactly coincide). But maybe they aren't as different as they thought they were.
  • Basketball: Abridged
    FIFTEEN MINUTE CHORAL READING PLAY: Eight jocks are gonna school you on how to play some ball.
  • Batman Vs. The Joker at the Laundromat
    TEN-MINUTE PLAY: I mean. Read the title.
  • Batman Vs. The Joker on Zoom
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: They gotta find a way to connect during the pandemic!! Can be performed via Zoom!
  • Blue
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Lilith loves the story of her Grandpa Lou, a heroic airplane pilot, but stories are just stories.
  • Check Me Out
    TEN-MINUTE PLAY: A non-fiction book about an intrepid climber of Mount Everest is incorrectly shelved amongst a bunch of "wannabe classics." And now, this climber has to live her life trapped with an annoying Cockney orphan, a sobbing heroine from the 1800s, and a sea captain with a reeeeeeeeally bad case of dysentery.
  • The Class of 2021
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Danny's school doesn't have a mask mandate, but his dad Alan wishes they did. A play for today about peer pressure and a longing for normal.
  • Direct Quoth
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Once upon a midnight dreary, a young writer struggles with the greatest horror of all... WRITER'S BLOCK! His flailing disturbs his neighbor who comes to check on him. Oh, and his neighbor is a raven.
  • Dragged
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Dawn didn't mean to get addicted to drugs, but it doesn't matter. And now, her daughter Max has to be her mother.
  • Everafter.com
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Little Miss Muffet has never had a boyfriend. It's adorable! And annoying, because that means that her best friends Rapunzel, Snow White, and Cinderella have to listen to her ramble about cheese every day, all day. In an effort to help their "not as socially adjusted" best friend, the princesses introduce Muffy to the wonderful "Everafter.com," a dating website for...
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Little Miss Muffet has never had a boyfriend. It's adorable! And annoying, because that means that her best friends Rapunzel, Snow White, and Cinderella have to listen to her ramble about cheese every day, all day. In an effort to help their "not as socially adjusted" best friend, the princesses introduce Muffy to the wonderful "Everafter.com," a dating website for girls might have a little problem meeting men in real life. After all, not everyone can have a meet cute, right? Published with YouthPLAYS.
  • First Line of Defense Against the Flu
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: White blood cells are going to take out the flu--unless the annoying anti-inflammatory that just showed up ruins everything...
  • Foliage
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Majestic Mark is a magician who is definitely ready for his first performance! Okay, so he needs like some practice. Or like. A lot of practice. And he's also not ready. His assistant Darrah has got her work cut for her.
  • Girl Dolls
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Customizable female "dolls" with advanced artificial intelligence are the norm, so what good is a real girl?
  • The Godfather of the Monkey Bars
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Mikey is the ruthless new godfather of the monkey bars, but rival gang lord Sunny doesn't like the way he's running them. I mean, what kind of monster doesn't let a kid hang upside down?
  • Good Cake
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Middle schooler Molly's mom died. Her five best friends came to the funeral, and really, truly have no idea how to act.
  • Green Grass
    TEN MINUTE PLAYS: Dani wants to move on. Jason wants her to stay where she is.
  • Hack3rz
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Charlie has set up a super fun world-building improv game for he (or she) and his friends to play long distance. Only problem is that Jordan and Dakota aren’t playing by the rules.

    Can and SHOULD be performed long distance!
  • The Hallmark Man Card
    FIFTEEN MINUTE PLAY: Justin's MRI results are back and he's out for the rest of the season. His teammates gather together in the locker room to speculate how he will act when he comes to his last practice. Published by YouthPLAYS.
  • Hashtag Safe Spacers
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: The world is a scary place, but don’t worry, brand new Hashtag Safe Spacers (as featured on Buzzfeed and now available on Amazon) have got you covered! Literally!
  • Have To
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: The world has ended and five teenagers are living in their abandoned school. The horrifying Bleeders who have killed many of their friends still roam. Now they must determine what they are willing to do to survive.
  • The Heroes in This Story
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Maybe they always wanted to be heroes, but not like this.
  • Heroes, Legends, Brothers
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Leon and Travis died in a school shooting. But before they did, they were heroes. This is their story--and promise, it won't be as bad as it sounds.
  • Hi, My Name is Matt
    SHORT PLAY: Matt didn't think his night would end like this.

    Available as a monologue, but also as an extended ten minute play.
  • How to Audition for a Play if You're a Girl
    TEN MINUTE CHORAL READING: Auditioning for a play is really hard if you're a girl! And challenging if you're a guy too because some lady might make you do it.
  • How to Get a Girl!
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Aw shucks, Champ's got a crush! Pops will teach him how to get a girl! After all, girls are less than men in every way!
  • Hunter, Hunted, and Those Who Watch
    TEN MINUTE: Jesse bullies Ryan mercilessly. It's not that bad, but it is that bad--that bad and worse.
  • iBully
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: The AI on Kelly's phone is 100% picking on her, but what else is a phone supposed to do?
  • In Dreams
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Some people love dreams, some don't.
  • The Inevitability of Sasha
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Sasha hates her birthday. Kate is convinced no one could hate their birthday! But maybe she just doesn't understand the inevitability of Sasha.
  • The Invention of Margaret E. Knight
    FIFTEEN MINUTE CHORAL READING: In 1850, a young American woman named Margaret E. Knight sees a horrible accident in the cotton mill that changes the course of her life. This is the true story of one of America's first female inventors, and how she invented herself.
  • José Interprets Dreams
    TEN-MINUTE PLAY: Seven-year-old American girl Caroline meets seven-year-old Mexican boy José where he is being held after being separated from his parents.
  • Last Chat
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Danny and Leah discuss a weird new app that lets you talk to dead people.

    This play can AND SHOULD BE performed long distance.
  • Leaves
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Alex's home life is horrible. She free writes about it.
  • Little Wishes
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Gray is a singer-songwriter with the number one song in the world. Lily has been his friend for years. Their reunion unfolds in his glamorous apartment which is full of everything he ever wished for.
  • Locker Room
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Joel has been warming the bench all season--and now Coach Patterson wants him to step up. Will he be able to put aside his pride for the good of the team? And what sport are they playing anyways? Part of THE DUDES ANTHOLOGY.
  • Make It Up
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: These bros didn't know they were gonna have to wear make up for the play. Not cool, man.
  • Mario Kart: A Sonata
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Once upon a time in a land very close to this one there lived four guys. And those four guys had one thing they liked to do more than anything in the world--and that one thing was hanging out and playing Mario Kart. And maybe they don't get each other, but they're friends, and they're all on the same race track. And it's small, and it's stupid, but maybe it's...
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Once upon a time in a land very close to this one there lived four guys. And those four guys had one thing they liked to do more than anything in the world--and that one thing was hanging out and playing Mario Kart. And maybe they don't get each other, but they're friends, and they're all on the same race track. And it's small, and it's stupid, but maybe it's not. Maybe it's just Mario Kart.
  • The Missing Link
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Calvin and his father Frank really have nothing in common--including belief in Bigfoot, but maybe their hearts aren't so different after all.
  • My Brother Hurts People, But Never Me
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Jenny and her brother Mark only have each other until Jenny has no one at all. A play about what it means to forgive.
  • Next Year and Other Indefinable Things
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Hannah, Corey, and Kelly have been friends all throughout high school and are planning on going to college together. Or, at least, that WAS the plan.
  • The Orchid
    TEN-MINUTE PLAY: Ryan tried to commit suicide. Jake visits him in the hospital. A play about toxic masculinity, enduring friendship, and what it means to be fragile when the world tells you to be unbreakable.
  • Present Tense
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Three siblings drive to their widowed mother's wedding while asking the impossible question--how do you move into the future without disrespecting the past?
  • Prince Nice Guy
    FIVE MINUTE PLAY: No one wants to date poor Prince Nice Guy! It is definitely not his fault in any way shape or form! ... Right? Part of THE DUDES ANTHOLOGY.
  • Remarkably, the Stars Say Hello
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Betty believes she was abducted with her husband Barney when they were younger. Barney wants to let it go, but it happened.
  • Sir Theo and the Swamp Boy
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: An imaginative boy named Teddy dreams of adventure. And then he finds it.
  • The Sentience Test
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: In order for a bot to be sold, it has to pass the sentience test.

    Selection: Kansas City Horror Play Festival
  • Something Profound
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: The Playwright has this AMAZING idea for a ten minute play, do you have ten minutes for her to tell you about it?
  • Super Heart
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Peter Parker (Spider-Man) was in class when Harry Osborn walked in with a gun. He reacted like a superhero. And now, Steve Rodgers (Captain America) has to help him pick up the pieces of his very human heart.
  • Ta-Da or Toodle-Oo
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Jim and Mr. W have a challenging working arrangement already--and Jim has reached the end of his rope when Mr. W starts to make unrealistic demands. Can they figure out an arrangement that works? And why does Mr. W hold so much sway over Jim anyways?
  • The Taking Tree
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Jake tries to get his friend Max to complete his family tree for a school project and ends up learning more about his friend than he anticipated. A play about the inevitability of life and death, and what we can do about it.
  • Things That Are Gray
    TEN-MINUTE PLAY: Marty is a rebel and a prisoner. Lux is a commander and a guard. Once, they were friends, but things are different now. This is the future, and hopefully it's distant.
  • The Thought Doesn't Count
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Rebecca and Tim don't talk about their problems--but come on, could a sock monkey really be the thing to bring them back together?
  • Tin Man
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: It's Dean's third football injury to his knee. He might have to get surgery. He and his friend Max talk about it. Part of THE DUDES ANTHOLOGY.
  • The Tree of Life
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Astronaut Captain Steve Lively has travelled through a black hole and found himself held captive by the mysterious Cin, a representative of the Yorrin Council. He struggles to understand what she wants from him, only to discover that maybe he should want something from her.

    Can and SHOULD be performed long distance!
  • The Wasn't Supposed to Girls
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Elaine has a weak mind, Miriam has a weak heart, and Patty has no courage, and they weren't supposed to be here.
  • Women's Ten Minute Play Selection Committee
    TEN MINUTE PLAY: Who better to choose plays for a Women's Ten Minute Play Festival than three dudes??? Oh and some girl but don't worry about her she's cool.
  • You'll Go Down in History
    TEN-MINUTE PLAY: 'Tis the season to visit people in prison I guess??
  • Balls
    FIVE MINUTE PLAY: Madeline's got some balls to talk as much as she does.
  • Teenage Oysters
    FIVE MINUTE PLAY: That awkward moment when you accidentally on purpose choke your least favorite misogynistic coworker with adolescent, rebellious oysters.
  • To Change a Tampon: How It Is, and How It Should Be
    FIVE MINUTE PLAY: Jane is menstruating. Literally how dare she.
  • You're Fired
    FIVE MINUTE PLAY: Lisa had a small issue with the stove.
  • Cast List
    ONE-MINUTE PLAY: High school theater politics.
  • Day Six
    ONE MINUTE PLAY: Day Six. Life has become unbearable. Teddy has held onto his humanity as long as he can.

    Selected for the Gi60 UK Festival.
  • Don't Step in That!
    ONE MINUTE PLAY: Seriously, don't!
  • East, West, North, South
    ONE MINUTE PLAY: He's going to do right by her, but she can't be let down again.
  • Moving Day
    ONE MINUTE PLAY: It's time.
  • Well, No, But(t)
    ONE MINUTE PLAY: You have no idea what Karen said.
  • Women, Am I Right?
    ONE MINUTE PLAY: Bob, Harry, and Jack watch sports and talk about how emotional women can get. Because ughhhh womennnnn.
  • You Can Do It!
    ONE MINUTE PLAY: Kevin is a good guy, but he gets nervous. His girlfriend Ashley is always happy to give him a push.
  • 10%
    MONOLOGUE: Sam is pretty sure she'll never hurt herself again. Pretty sure.
  • Cape Time
    MONOLOGUE: This quarantine thing isn't so bad for teens! Less responsibilities! That is, unless you happen to be a superhero. UGHHHHHH.
  • Drowned
    MONOLOGUE: A princess loved for her silence tries to find her voice.
  • I'm Having the Worst Day
    MONOLOGUE: Danielle's dad is dying so don't tell her you're having the worst day.
  • I Won't Take a Bullet for My Students
    MONOLOGUE: I won't.
  • Imagine
    MONOLOGUE: Imagine there's love, and then there's none.
  • Jason's Dog
    A MONOLOGUE: Jason loves his dog more than anything.
  • Jeff McClain Barters in a Crevice
    MONOLOGUE: Jeff has hiked this trailer twenty-four and one-third times. He never thought he'd have an accident. And now he's trapped, and he has some ends to tie up.
  • Oxygen Thief
    MONOLOGUE: A former soldier trying to come to terms with the terrible thing that happened to her hundreds of miles from a battlefield.
  • River, Run!
    MONOLOGUE: River has superpowers. River didn't ask for superpowers.
  • A Teacher's Prayer During Online Learning
    MONOLOGUE: An irreverent prayer for strength, patience, and forgiveness. Look, we're all just trying to survive, so cut us some slack, okay?
  • Wash Your Hands, You Moron
    MONOLOGUE: Kelley is a nurse and she is done saying it nicely.
  • What I'll Be Remembered For
    MONOLOGUE: Leonard knows what he'll be remembered for, SO FINE WE'LL JUST TALK ABOUT THE TIME HE BARFED IN BIOLOGY. HAPPY NOW????
  • Required Reading
    FIVE MINUTE MIME: How do you think the characters in a book feel when you keep putting it down over and over again?